Mentally constipated.

    This is what it's like to be a writer. I'm a writer, I've always loved english, reading, writing it's just my thing. Loving english and wanting to be a writer are two different things. Loving english is one thing, so you like to read or write poetry, that's fine. But deciding to spend your life writing is hard work.

    Especially if you work from home, there are so many distractions. Now my husband works from home too and sometimes that's good but sometimes it's more of a distraction. If I get stuck on a paragraph or a chapter it's so easy to log onto Pinterest and spend an eternity searching for cupcake recipes I'll never try or workouts to get killer abs. My dog will bring a toy to me and I'll spend an hour playing fetch with her. My husband will get tired of being in the house and want to go for a walk. You'll hear of a marathon of a show you like, or twelve days worth if you watched The Simpsons marathon a couple of weeks ago. Everything becomes a distraction when you work from home. EVERYTHING!

    I've tried all kind of things to stay focused. I wake up early and go for a walk around the neighborhood with some neighbors, I workout in the mornings, I do yoga, I meditate. Anything to get rid of pent up energy and clear my mind but that's not always a good thing. Sometimes I clear my mind too much and can't remember how I wanted to go about the next chapter.

    I don't know about other writers but I get stuck A LOT! Sometimes it takes me months to unclog my mind, I call it mental constipation. When I get mentally constipated the only thing that helps me dislodge the clog is to re-read everything I have already written. It takes a while but it helps me. 

    Then I go through a moment of panic when I question everything that I wrote. I wonder if it's good, if it will make sense to anyone other than me, if I'm cut out to be a writer, or if I'll forever be a freelance writer that doesn't get paid for the work I do. 

    Like I said before I love writing, it will always be my passion but geez does it have to be so difficult. I don't think I'll ever choose a different path for me. Writing is my life. And now I'm furthering my career by becoming a book reviewer. That brings two of my passions together, reading and writing. I don't get paid actual money right now but I get free books which is a win to me!